I've realized that this isn't really a "Hack" for WP exactly, it's more of a stand alone kind of thing that I'm tacking on to WP. My attempt at layout is above. So far, not so successfull. I can't figure out how to center my big image vertically, and I haven't yet tried it with vertical images, so we'll see what's up as I go. Still no closer to figuring out how to automate the process of updating them either.