So, here's how it works... I pick someone I know and ask them questions derived from an interview with a celebrity. Today's interview subject is my brother. The interview questions came from an interview with Chris Rock. In this case I let my brother pick the celebrity, but didn't explain how it worked. He picks the celebrity for the next victim subject.
Me: Who makes you laugh?
Brother: Chris Rock
M: anyone else?
B: Samuel L Jackson
I don't like white people
M: Why not?
B: bathing habits, lack of rythym... dancing
that kind of thing
M: You don't like bathing habits?
B: I don't like white people
their bathing habbits are one reason
M: What would an action figure of you look like?
B: of me?
M: yeah.
B: he'd look like a big guy in a white cheerleader outfit with shiny silver and purple stripes and he'd have a hot sidekick in a skirt
M: What would you do if you woke up one morning with the body of a 60-year-old white man?
B: like... I was in it? or laying next to me?
M: Um... you were in it?
B: well if it was after october 20 2041 and before October 20 2044, I'd be ok with that... if was after october 20 2044, I'd be pretty happy. If it were tomorrow, I'd probably shit my inconenent self and go yell at small children and their parents
M: and if you were next to it?
B: oh yeah and as an addendum to the "who makes you laugh" I thought of a white guy... Family guy... they're all white
whole show is frikkin great
so is Aqua Teen Hunger Force but they're not even human
if I were next to the body of a 60 year old man, I'd freak the hell out- probably shit myself and then go find out what the hell I ingested the previous night
and look through his wallet
M: Do you believe in reincarnation?
B: nope
not really
M: If you had to come back as something what ould you wnat to be?
B: a house cat... a big one like Chubby
or me but with better foresight
M: Why a house cat?
B: eat, sleep, play, run the world with a flick of my tail and get adored for it
M: Where's the strangest place you've ever woken up?
B: added to their ability to be completely adorable while doing the most despicable things on earth
strangest place I've ever awakened..... ummmm... under the bleachers at the Cornell Gym
M: I want to know what your take is on the controversy with Eminem. Is it a white thing, a black thing, a rap thing, or a First Amendment thing?
B: there's a controversy with Eminem?
M: Hey, I ask the questions here.
B: wasn't aware there was a new one
M: Who said anything about a new one?
B: oh just his ongoing thing
M: sure
B: Eminem is a bit of an enigma. I think the controversy is essentially over the prudishness of society as a whole. We don't like things being flung in our faces. Eminem loves to fling things in our faces, whether it's race, sexuality, violence, or just slapstick comedy. I can't claim to know as I've never sat down and talked with him but it seems that he has a great deal of respect for minorities and his constant stereotyping thereof is essentially a foil- showing us our prejudices and our fears by dancing on our taboos. to say fag, bitch, and fuck so freely is to say that these words only have power because we are afraid of them.
M: Okay, last question. Pick a celebrity for the next interview.
B: Brad Pitt
M: Thanks
So when it comes time for the next interview I'll run a Google search on "Brad Pitt Interview" and use the questions from whatever I find there as the basis for the next interview. Should be fun.
Leave a Comment
Before leaving a comment, please ensure you have read and understand my comments policy and my privacy policy. Any comment that does not abide by the comment policy will be deleted immediately.